Safety Tips for You and Your Family
by: Alaska Legal Services Corporation
Whether or not you feel capable of leaving an abuser, there are things you can do to make you and your family safer.
IN AN EMERGENCY
If you are at home and you are being threatened or attacked:
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stay away from bathrooms, closets, and other small spaces where you could be trapped
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get to a room with a door or window to use to escape
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get to a phone to call for help
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lock the abuser outside if you can
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call 911 for help and get the dispatcher's name
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think of a neighbor or friend you can run to for help
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if a police officer comes, tell the officer what happened, and get the officer's name
IF YOU ARE HURT
If you or a member of your family is hurt by the abuser:
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get medical help as soon as possible
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get the name of the doctor, nurse, or EMT who helps you
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tell the doctor, nurse or EMT how you got hurt
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take pictures of any bruises, cuts, scrapes or injuries
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call the shelter for help with a safety plan
HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF AT HOME
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Keep a phone in a room you can lock from the inside
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If the abuser has moved out, change the locks on all the doors; put locks on your windows
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Plan an escape route from the house; teach it to your children
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Ask your neighbors to call the police if they see the abuser around your house
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Pack a bag with things you would need to get away (i.e. your important papers, court papers, money, medication, etc.); put it in your trunk or another safe place you could get to in an emergency
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Make copies of your car keys and put them somewhere you could get them in an emergency
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Get an unlisted phone number and caller i.d.
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Screen your calls with an answering machine
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Take a self defense course
HOW TO PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN
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Teach them how to call 911 in an emergency
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Agree on a specific neighbor or friend they can run to for help
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If you have a court order giving you custody, give copies to the school principals, day care providers, babysitters, etc.
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Make sure the schools, day cares, etc. know to NEVER give out your phone number or address
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Agree on a password & teach your children not to go with anyone who does not know it
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Teach them not to answer the phone when you aren't at home
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Make sure they know to tell you when they have seen or talked to the abuser
HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF
AWAY FROM HOME
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Change your route to work, the market, etc.
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Change the places and times you shop
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Close any joint bank accounts
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Open new bank accounts at a different bank
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If you have a protective order, keep it with you all the time; keep a copy in your glove compartment
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Tell someone where you are going, and when you expect to be back
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If possible, try to have a friend go with you when you go out
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If you receive e-mail from the abuser, print it out and save it on a removable disk
HOW TO BE SAFER AT WORK
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If you have a protective order, keep a copy at work
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Give a photo of the abuser to your supervisor & co-workers; ask them to call the police if they see the abuser at work
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Don't go to lunch or on break alone
HOW TO BE SAFE AT THE COURTHOUSE
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Sit as far from the abuser as possible
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Do not talk to the abuser, their friends or family
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Tell the court officer if the abuser bothers you
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Bring a friend or relative with you
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Ask the court officer to keep the abuser in the court while you leave, or to accompany you to your car
PROTECTIVE ORDERS
A protective order is like a restraining order. It can do any of the following:
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order the abuser to stay away from you
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order the abuser out of the house
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grant temporary custody of the children & child support to you
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order specific times & days for visitation
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order the abuser to go to counseling
For more information about protective orders, contact your local shelter or ALSC office.
CRIMINAL PROCEEDINGS
Criminal cases are handled by the District Attorney. Be sure that you tell the District Attorney:
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exactly what happened
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whether you were hurt
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whether the abuser has hurt you before
Show the District Attorney any pictures you have of injuries or damage to property caused by the abuser. Give the District Attorney copies of any protective orders you have gotten against your abuser, even if they have expired.
IT IS IMPORTANT TO TELL THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY THAT YOU WANT TO BE NOTIFIED BEFORE THE ABUSER IS RELEASED FROM JAIL.
THIS PAMPHLET IS NOT MEANT TO TAKE THE PLACE OF LEGAL ADVICE. EACH CASE IS DIFFERENT, AND REQUIRES INDIVIDUAL ATTENTION. CONSULT A LAWYER FOR SPECIFIC LEGAL ADVICE.
Based in part upon the American Bar Association's Domestic Violence Safety Plan: Safety Tips for You and Your Family,
a joint project of the ABA Tort & Insurance Practice Section and the ABA Commission on Domestic Violence.
SAFETY TIPS FOR YOU AND YOUR FAMILY
A public service provided by
ALASKA LEGAL SERVICES
Last Reviewed On: 05/16/03
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