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Preparing for a divorce

You've decided to get a divorce.  Here are some things you should do.  These will help you wether or not you go to court.

1)  Protect yourself and your children from violence:  Do you think your spouse will hurt you or your kids?  You can get a temporary emergency restraining order.  Most family violence shelters will help you with this.  You should get an order if:

• Your spouse has abused you or your children in the past;
• You believe your spouse will try to hurt you or your children.

Remember, the restraining order is temporary.  You have to renew it.

You should find a friend or family member who you can stay with if you need to.

2)  Decide if you want a lawyer:  Read this article on getting a lawyer.

3)  Get your financial papers:  Make a list of what you have and what you owe.  Next, get the papers that prove it:

• Bank statements,
• Credit card statements,
• Car loans,
• Mortgage payments,
• Tax returns,
• Investment statements,
• Insurance statements,
• Any other financial statements.

Also, if your spouse has wasted money get proof of it.  This includes gambling and buying too much alcohol and/or illegal drugs.  Find receipts, cancelled checks, credit card statements, and bank statements that show your spouse wasted money.

Put all of these papers in a safe place NOT in your home.  It's best to give them to your lawyer.  If you don't have a lawyer, give them to a friend or relative you trust.

4)  List your property:  List your community property and separate property.  (Click here to learn about property.)  Your lawyer can help you with this if you have one.

5)  Make a budget:  Figure out how much money you will need to live on your own.  If you have kids, figure out how much you'll need for them.

Think about these things when you make a budget:

• How much do I make?
• How much do I need to support myself (and my children)?  Can I do it on my own?
• How much does your spouse make?
• Has your spouse agreed to help you?

6)  Plan your time:  Divorces can take a long time.  In Wyoming, there has to be 20 days from the time the divorce starts to when it ends.  But they can take a lot longer.  Some divorces can last months if you go to trial.

7)  Stay out of trouble:  While you are going through a divorce, everything you do can change the outcome.  Don't do anything that would give the judge or other people involved in the case a bad impression of you.